Entitled mother-in-law breaks no-contact to write bizarre birthday post to her son: 'If this is considered passive-aggressive, than I guess I am!'

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Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Dec 7, 2025 11:00 AM EST

More and more people are going low or no contact with their own parents because the parents simply cannot act right, and this MIL is a great example. 

A lot of people these days have been cutting off their parents, and some have posited that it's because we're all too connected. In the past, if your mom annoyed you, you could just let all her calls go to voicemail for a while, and if she showed up knocking at your house, you could pretend that you weren't home until she left. This would give both of you time to cool off and think about how to mend things. But these days, parents talk to their kids constantly through texting and social media, and a lot of them have their children's locations, too. This makes it all but impossible to ignore a parent who's been behaving in an unkind way. And oftentimes, the parent will push their child too far, making them make the painful choice to limit their contact. 

This person's MIL is a great example of the selfishness that some parents bring to the table, as you can read for yourself in the utterly insane pity-party post she wrote for her son's birthday. As one commenter noted, in a birthday post to someone else, she used the words "myself" and "I" more than a dozen times! She wants everyone to know that she's the innocent party here, and her big mean old son is the one who's "hurting" her and her husband. If she actually had respect for her child, she would never write this humiliating message for the world to see. It's crystal clear that she thinks she's 100% in the right — so much so that it's all she can think about, even on her son's birthday. It's telling that she writes about how he requested to go no-contact 6 months ago due to things being said that couldn't be unsaid. But it's as if she hasn't taken a single second to reflect on her own actions, because she refuses to acknowledge that most of these parent-child conflicts are caused by both parties, to some extent. It's really pathetic, and if she ever sees the post and reads the comments, maybe she'll gain a much-needed reality check. In the meantime, though, I hope this person and the husband demand that the MIL take this post down, before blocking her so they don't have to see this kind of drivel ever again. 

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  • 01

    'My MIL's birthday post to my husband'

    Elderly woman with white bob haircut stares into the distance while placing hands on laptop computer, on table is vase of white tulips and blue coffee mug
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    Here's what she wrote online:

    Wanted to wish my son Happy Birthday. We have not spoken in 6 months, at his request. I have honored that request with a broken heart. There have been things that have been said and done that can never been taken back. It's too late. I have been told that I am "passive aggressive" and that I need to change. I have thought long and hard during our time of silence and have made a determination that will probably cause me to lose my son if I haven't already. He has hurt both his father and myself b
    via u/MysticWolf1994
  • 03
    something that we will NEVER forgive him for when he could have come to us about it. So here is my message because I KNOW I will get a letter from your wife regarding this post. Tam, you are my son and I will ALWAYS love you. Happy birthday and I hope that you have a wonderful life. If this is considered passive aggressive then I guess that I am. Happy Birthday!!!!
    via u/MysticWolf1994
  • 04
    So, as the post says, we went no contact with my husband's parents back in May after months of trying to work with them to come up with a resolution to our issues with them. They are very manipulative and toxic and I tried for over 5 years to gain their
    via u/MysticWolf1994
  • 05
    approval when all they did was treat me like shit. Anyways, my husband called me this morning with this screenshot of his mother's post on FB for his birthday. I'm so frustrated, angry, and upset that she broke the no contact boundary just
    via u/MysticWolf1994
  • 06
    to shame him and make his birthday about her. Even worse, all the comments either say, "happy birthday," or "I hope things work out. Life is short." But I don't have anyone to talk to in my life about this so thank you for allowing me to vent her.
    via u/MysticWolf1994
  • 07
    DarkShad... "I have been told that I am passive aggressive" hmm, I wonder why?
    via u/DarkShadowZangoose
  • 08
    Midori_93 Worst thing you can do to her is to ignore it and don't give it any attention. She's baiting you
    via u/Midori_93
  • 09
    FLCLotaku Pretty sure that "I" key's paint is worn off
    via u/FLCLotaku
  • 10
    ColdFall2... Pretty sure the written text could be used to define passive aggression.
    via u/ColdFall2562
  • 11
    Jungleby... Yeah that seems passive aggressive to blend an intense personal message, and throw shade at the daughter-in-law, while saying "Happy Birthday!!!!"
    via u/Junglebyron
  • 12
    Jenn31709 No contact means blocking them on social media too. This is how they creep back into your life even without speaking to them.
    via u/Jenn31709
  • 13
    It's obvious why you all walked away, so cut the cord completely
    via u/Jenn31709
  • 14
    Xerxesxc I can offer no advice but to say you can choose your mate but you can't choose your in-laws. Sorry you don't have someone in your life to really vent.
    via u/Xerxesxc
  • 15
    AndISoun... He needs to block his mother on Facebook so he never sees what she's writing.
    via u/AndISoundLikeThis

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